Limbo..

.. well that's where I feel I am...in a place somewhere between all those chores I want to be able to do and the other place where I don't give a rat's ass! 

It's amazing how as I get older I can feel more and more understanding for my mum and how she must have felt about things.. all kinds of things.. but mainly when things are all a little bit much and you feel like there's too much to do, and even when someone offers to help you say no because if you can't find the energy then you sure don't want someone else doing it and making you feel even more inadequate.. or even have to feel grateful!

I know Mum used to say that at Easter time all her friends had done spring cleaning and were all ready for family to visit and take some time off, but in our house Easter meant a big rush to get violets picked, bunched, packaged and off to market right til the last minute and no time for prepping for the long weekend.. then before she knew it, all manner of holiday makers would turn up full of the joys of a trip away.. and expect to receive (and would get) a warm 'heavy cake' welcome from Mum!

At Christmas she used to produce this pile of presents she had acquired during infrequent trips to town and then try to match them to the numerous cousins who all required a present. I felt a bit the same when I stumbled on the 1/2 price games section of M&S on Sunday and just bought as varied a pile as I could, thinking that I'd sort out who would get what later on!

Poor Col, his non-awareness of time and dates comes into its own at this time of year. Once he was inviting colleagues to visit from the US and looking at our planner he said.. that week 24/ 25 December looks quite quiet..and he still doesn't have any sense of urgency about how much we (or is that I) need (or in my case want rather than need) to do before the same 24/ 25 December this year!.. or is that a man thing in general?

I love the build up to Christmas better than the day itself, the anticipation, seeing everyone and stuff, and once the day has passed it all seems a bit irrelevant, so you can imagine I was not a happy bunny when today it looked like he was heading for 4 days away driving next week!  Luckily it seems most customers feel as I do (and have last minute shopping to sort?) so hope it might only be a 2-day trip after all.

Anyways, had a lovely night last night with the Scrapbook Massive as my kids call it, lovely meal, great ladies and a wish to repeat more often! 
It looks like everyone in our house may be getting a little better and at least this little rant is healthier than a moan and cheaper than therapy!  Hitting Penzance to test the late-night shopping tomorrow and then maybe I'll feel a bit more organised. It's difficult being an out-of-control control freak you know!